Kitchen Calamity

Sometimes, I'm really lazy. Tonight I went to start a load of dirty dishes in the dishwasher and I discovered the box of Cascade was totally empty. Holding the box upsidedown and shaking it violently only produced a light sprinkle of soap granules and a cloud of dust. Even though there's a big ass twenty four hour grocery store right around the corner from where I live, I decided to take the easy way out. I substituted liquid dish soap for the other kind. No big deal, dish soap is dish soap. Doesn't matter if it comes out of a bottle or a box. Right?

I learned the hard way that not all dish soaps are created equally, nor are they all universal in purpose. After I filled both compartments with green Palmolive where the dusty granulated soap usually goes, I slammed the door on the dishwasher shut and fired that sucker up. No sooner had I turned around to grab a beer I noticed suds were pouring out from under the dishwasher's door frame. Then the kitchen floor flooded. And then soapy suds were engulfing the entire kitchen like The Blob. The mass of pure white soap suds were making a run through the utility room for the garage.



Fourty five minutes later I had beads of sweat collecting in my eyebrows. I contained the soap sludge armed only with a ratty old mop and a bottle of Negra Modelo beer.



Evidently, I fucked up. Liquid dish soap is not okay for the dishwasher. Now I know.